The new day and age of "holleration"

We've all been through it. Someone is diggin' you but you're not feeling them. This used to happen in bars and clubs and all those social scenes. Now....it's happening ONLINE.

You big bammaz you. I get a kick out of being "holla'd" at through MySpace / Facebook etc. etc. Whatever social network that you use. Seriously, how many of you end up falling for these big bammaz? I guess I can understand if you're still in high school and don't have THAT many outside social settings besides house parties etc. But honestly, it's depressing when you're 30 plus and trying to holla at someone online. I would like to be the first person to tell the world to STOP DOING THAT SH**!!!!

It's not cute.

Moral: don't be a bamma, go out into the real world with the rest of us and holla in the old fashioned way....IN YO FACE!

New blogs....I like it!!!

My friend just pointed out a very cool blog to me. What happens is, you send them ONE PHRASE and then they create a picture for it, with their own creations and characters etc.

Here's the site:

PHRASES

Moral: There is none, go do something with your life

MTV Video Music Awards 2008......FAIL!

What a disapointing expression of art/fashion and music all in one place at the same time. This could have been due to several things in being as bad as they were:

1.) someone slipped through the hiring process for MTV and just graduated from high school and made everything for that generation

2.) Hollywood believes that no matter what, anything goes....WRONG

3.) someone with no talent slept their way to the top to get the top executive position to produce the awards with ZERO experience

Seriously, it could have been any of those reasons. I still can't believe I wasted all those hours watching it last night, just hoping that someone would steal the show. WRONG

Not only was it impossible to watch (mainly due to that f**king annoying British dude that wouldn't shut up and thought that he was hilarious....I never heard people really laugh at his jokes, they went by his crazy awful appearance). They literally ignored the motto, "Don't judge a book by it's cover" He SUCKED so badly.

Now here's my list of everything that was wrong about this years VMA's:

1) Rhianna's new look (what's up with the mullet/rat-tail?) and why did she have toilet paper hanging off the entire back of her so called "dress" ??? Does Chris Brown still want to hit that after the way she looked last night? He probably threw up a little bit in his mouth like I did.

2) Britney Spears weave-o-rific hot mess hair of the week (way to go guuuurl)......I love how you could see exactly where the attachments were made when there was a spotlight behind her highlighting all of her hair, or what's left of it still (womp womp)

3) Lil Wayne's undies need to stay the F**k in their place (inside your jeans), What girls think that you look good? They must be more busted looking than yourself. First off you look like a troll with bad luck. You're not hood anymore, you dress like a f**king douche bag from Williamsburg BK with your trendy ass outfits. You're swagger and grimy side is completely GONE *poof*....Lil Wayne gets a quick FAIL from me with his style.

4) T-Pain.....honestly what the F**K were you thinking with that horrid outfit of yours? You just stole Solange Knowles bamma of the week award with your outfit. Looking like the MAD TEA HATTER from Alice In Wonderland... NOT PIMPIN'!!!! Flava Flav already took that look awhile ago. FAIL

Ladies and Gents, the ONLY good act was PINK because she's the SH** and knows it and she's good at what she does. She stole everyones show for the night. I didn't like Kayne's new song....it's going to be one of those tracks that you hear over and over and over again and that's how the music industry tries to make everyone like the same song. Lets be clear about something though,...if you don't like it the first time you hear it, that means that it's BAD. Kayne, FAIL. Everyone get off the d**k-rydin' conceded Kanye Train...it's not cute and he's still a bamma as well.

In terms of outfits that everyone wore last night, it can best be discribed with one word: AWFUL. The fashion world is on a halt with what they're trying to do with musicians, because they obviously didn't even try to make ANYONE look good last night. Did you see what Lindsey Lohan was wearing? It was a joke. It's like nobody was trying and then there's Britney Spears and her hooker Vegas dresses...poor thing, she's such a hick it's unbelievable. The only entertaining outfit was what Katty Perry wore, it was this white old school 50's style swimsuit/ jumpsuit that had a banana on her shoulder strap that she could peal and she did while performing 'I Kissed a Girl'. (I hate that song, but it's catchy as hell).

So MTV, I'm disapointed in you. You brought NOTHING to the table last night, you're staff should be fired. I hope you have a good excuse and I can't believe that some of the reviews I've been reading were in support of the award show. F**king AWFUL.

Moral: bad things happen to good networks.....MTV FAIL

THIS IS THAT NEW FIRE!!!

This is by far the BEST song I've heard in 2008. You don't have to pretend like you don't think it's the sh** either. Just keep it real *wink* It's a classic, HANDS DOWN

JAW DROPPER:
It's So Cold In The D


Moral: Just because you are a human and can talk and make noises shouldn't allow you to think that you're an artist

Republican Party and Convention Disturbing?...YES!

Does anyone else find this photo taken of the "attempting" VP (Polin) seem a little bit similar to something that went down in 1942?

Just wondering.......this "woman" isn't about anything that women have been fighting for.

HAY-DA-DIT!!!

NEXT!!!

Moral: just because someone says that they stand for something, doesn't mean that they really do. Walk the walk and talk the talk....don't half a** things

90210...............FAIL

I don't like to get caught up in the TV world considering all the rich programming that's out there filling my mind (SARCASM). It challenges my thoughts with things like, "would I slap her if she did that?" and all sorts of super important Flava of Love style women and men that get to grace my TV screen and eyes.

Last night I DID watch the season premier of 90210.....now lets talk about this. The media was super hyping it up to the point that the Washington Post said that it's producers wouldn't even allow critics to do TV reviews before it popped up on TV last night. So here's MY REVIEW of the show:

90210 back in the 90's had something going on for what it was back then. There weren't 20 other shows that were identical to the style it held, maybe Melrose Place, but that's about it. It was still a late night soap opera with a little bit more reality in there in terms of the problems....but ONLY comparing it to DAY TIME Soap Operas. Anyways, the characters all felt generic to the other programs that CW has during the rest of the year. Nothing at all stood out. It felt like I was just watching another version of Gossip Girl or something along those story lines. I watched the entire 2 hour premier and to this hour I have no idea WHY. Was it because they made it seem like it would be so exclusive that I would feel like it's the sh** since I'm watching it? Clearly I'm not their demographic AT ALL (considering that I'm obessesed with CURRENT TV and almost nothing else on TV). It was pure spoon fed entertainment, which of course was what I was expecting from the show, but it honestly didn't even do THAT for me. It was a straight up WASTE-O-TIME, ya dig? Not only was I not even impressed, but I felt even more upset because I could have written up a better script than what they brought to the table. Now I know that this is only the beginning since they're trying to make it dramatic as the one in the 90's but it's hard man....it's hard to even have a desire to pay attention.

Just another reason why NOT to have a kid, so they won't be subjected to dealing with this when they land on earth.

Moral: maybe if you move to Africa you won't have to deal with programs like this? Just a thought...

Sometimes your pants split...it's part of life

I had an eventful weekend. It involved a good ol' fashioned POTLUCK....which there was plenty of on both ends, POT & LUCK. The following day was my girls surprise engagement party which ended up finishing dancing to Reggae music until 2am....folks, THIS is where it all went down hill.

Not only did I have a GREEN MONSTER to start off with when I got there (Long Island Iced Tea with melon juice instead of coke to make it green).......but I kept droppin' it like it's HOT to every song that was played. I even put on a little show to make heads turn, THANK GOD they stopped and started dancing themselves because what I'm about to share with you next would have been AWFUL if anyone but my friends saw it.

Apparently I dropped it like it was TOO HOT, and my pants decided that during Buju Bunton's song "Champion" they would part ways......my pants divorced eachother right there on the dance floor. My pants SPLIT from the belt loop ALL the way down to my knee cap. I COULD NOT MAKE THIS UP IF I WANTED TO.

So what does anyone do when their pants split? That's right.....GET THE F*** out of there!!!!! Which is what I did with my girls brothers shirt tied around my waste that hung low enough to block my extremely exposed a** to the streets. Good thing I drove too, riding the METRO pant-less, isn't a good look in DC.

MORAL: don't buy linen "jeans" and think that you can dance in them....they will hate you and prove it on the dance floor